With the book "How long does sadness last?" [1], Maria Farm has written a guide on the subject of farewell, loss and grief. Due to the extremely simple language and the determined formulations with understandable metaphors as a foundation, this is suitable reading and effective help not only for grieving children and young people, but also for adults in grieving situations. Because these grieving people - whether old or young - usually lack the strength to familiarize themselves with complicated or difficult to understand specialist literature.

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Explanation without technical jargon.

In 128 pages, Maria Farm manages to ease the burden of grief with beautiful illustrations and to explain the stages of grief "shock, reaction phase, processing and reorientation" [2] in a lifelike manner without the use of technical jargon.

Using examples, comforting imagery and advice, as well as exercises, she skilfully works through each phase up to “completed grief” – which is like background music – [3]. This equips the person reading with a starlight “which is supposed to help in difficult situations” – similar to the mighty Galadriel in “The Lord of the Rings”, who gives the hobbit Frodo a starlight in preparation for the dangers of the adventure that still lie ahead [4].

Do not view grief in isolation.

But Maria Farm also demonstrates in the first chapters that grief should not be viewed in isolation, but that we should also understand what exactly happens when someone dies or when we are faced with a bereavement. She specifically combines this work of understanding with facts about death and dying, without losing the lightness of her language or straying into burdensome complexity. Here she provides scientific findings and explanations and seems to be able to empathize with what the reader must be suffering at every stage.

Conclusion.

Overall, Maria Farm's Guide for Children and Teens feels like a deep and empathetic look into the soul that makes the reader feel recognized. Who picks up the person reading exactly where they are with their grief and provides meaningful explanations that answer those essential questions that fall in a torrent on grieving people.


[1] First published in 2022 at Oetinger

[2] From "How long does sadness last?" by Maria Farm (Oetinger) - Page 63

[2] From "How long does sadness last?" by Maria Farm (Oetinger) - Page 99

[2] From "How long does sadness last?" by Maria Farm (Oetinger) - Page 81